A Day out with Thomas, and why this was so significant for us.

When it comes to family activities, we are all for the free/cheap fun. I have discovered that my kids typically will have just as much, if not more fun without costing us much or any money. So when I saw the price tag on the Day out with Thomas tickets, I was more than a little hesitant. The tickets would cost a little more than $60 for the family, not to mention that gas money for the two hour car trip. And while that may not seem like a lot for some, for this frugal momma, it was enough to make me more than a little uncomfortable!

After a lot of discussion with the hubby, going back and forth about it several times, we realized that events like this are why we wanted to get our budget under control. My son, Jameson, is absolutely nuts about Thomas the Train. There is not a day that goes by when he doesn't play with his trains, heck, the kid has a Thomas the Train bed! This was not something that would just be a fun outing for the family- it would truly be a dream come true for my little boy.

A year or so ago, something like this would have resulted in one of two scenarios:

1. We would decide not to go because we couldn't afford it since we had no money in savings and be bummed that we couldn't get this experience for my kiddos.
2. We would go anyway, put it on a credit card, and I would feel guilty about it the whole time.

But this time, the money was there. We have been saving for a mini-vacation for our family this summer. Based on our preliminary figuring, it is going to be a pretty inexpensive vacation that we had over-saved for, which meant that we had plenty that we could pull from that budget column to pay for the tickets. Also, we have been really good at conserving our gas this week, so we would have plenty in the gas budget to cover the extra gas for the trip.

Since we have gotten such a grasp on our finances, we were able to easily pay cash for the whole thing. Again, I realize that while $60 isn't much to some of you, others might actually think we are crazy for dropping that kind of money on a 20 minute train ride (since the other activities were all free). But you know what? We had the money because we have worked hard to save it, and we created family memories that we all, especially Jameson, will not soon forget. Want more convincing? Let these pictures do the job:

Posing in front of Thomas- and of course I took my own pictures instead of buying theirs! Duh! You couldn't have expected me to go totally crazy :)

Crazy girl coloring.

Chugging along the track!

Showing off their tattoos!

Waiting for the bouncy slide

Jump!

We met Sir Topam Hatt!

Crazy drivers!

More posting with Thomas!

Petting zoo 

Showing me his ticket for the train ride

Sassy girl

So excited to be walking up this train aisle!

I love her "cheese" face

This smile made it ALL worth it!

Me and my little train nut

So silly!

Amazing family memories- worth every penny!

Mommy wars

With the recent Time magazine cover, there has been a wildfire of mommy wars being started. For those of you not familiar with this term, it is when a hot issue is presented on social networking, message boards, blogs, etc that gets mothers pitted against each other, being critical of the choices of other moms and trying to make sure everyone knows that their way is the right way.

I am sure this little intro doesn't leave you wondering how I feel about these. So it might strike you as odd that I am going to try to start one, right here, right now. 

You ready? It's going to be good.

I am going to try to start a mommy war against...

MOMMY WARS!!!

That's right! I think that, as mothers, we all need to gang up on this awful thing called mommy wars. I don't know about you guys, but I am SICK of them. I often like to read books set a few hundred years ago, or books about cultures that are more secluded from the media world (in other countries, Amish communities) and when I read these books, I find myself jealous that the mothers work together, not against each other, to raise their children. I so wish that we lived in a world where we could respect each others differences as mothers rather than try to critique each other. As women and mothers, don't we owe it to each other to be their to support one another, not judge?

Now, I am not telling you to turn the other way when your friend who is a mother is doing something they may not know is dangerous. But, there is a big difference between politely cluing a friend in on new car seat guidelines, as opposed to bashing them for being so uninformed about their child's safety. It is one thing to fill your mommy pal in on how much you enjoyed breastfeeding and offering to be there for support through their struggles, it is another thing to beat them down on their choice to formula feed and make them feel guilty for doing what they feel is best (especially when they have reached a point where they can't go back on this decision).  

There are TON of different parenting styles. And, you know what, THAT IS GOOD! Although I feel that research, my maternal instincts, and my teachings from mothers in my life have lead me to my parenting style make my parenting style the "right" way, that doesn't make it the right way for every mom. Some moms need more space, and THAT IS OKAY. Some parents find that they parent best and their child fares best when they are more hands on. MORE POWER TO YOU! Some mothers find that they serve their families best as a stay at home mom, and others find that having a job outside the home allows them to give themselves more fully to their children when they are with them and contribute financially to the family. Why does one have to be a "right" answer????? 

It is time that we stop obsessing over the "right" way to parent and realize that the best way that we can help our children and the children of our friends grow the best is to stop attacking every little thing other moms do and start showing some support. You don't have to agree with every little decision that your friends make as parents- they probably don't agree with all of yours! As long as their children are healthy, are having their needs met, and feel loved, they do not need every little decision they make being critiqued! 

It is time that us mommies make a stand against these mommy wars going on and learn that running another mother down for her choices will do nothing but bum her out and take her focus away from doing what is best for her children. But offering gentle guidance when needed and giving encouragement and support when she needs it will go a long way!

Okay... stepping off the soapbox now... :)